Marc Morgenstern - DirectorSlashWriter

An accidental reactor leak in Los Angeles caused a minor explosion and spewed nuclear radiation into the soil. The dead ended up absorbing an a substantial amount and became re-animated. Aware and hungry, they roamed Los Angeles in search of human flesh. No one really noticed.

 

Ten years have passed and before it was finally brought to the attention of the President. Immediately seeing an environmental and social problem, he declared an outstanding clean-up initiative that would make Los Angeles the safe and clean state it once was. Unfortunately with the swearing-in of the new President in 2000, all action that was to be taken to clean up the state was dropped claiming that, “One Zombie infested State in fifty-six ain’t so bad. That’s only, like, 10 percent.”

 

The “Clean up Los Angeles” Initiative was abandoned and LA was ignored by the government faster than you can say ‘tsunami’. Zombies ended up having unfettered free reign of the State. The citizens of Los Angeles, although unhappy with current events, did as they have done for all recorded history: nothing really. 

 

The Zombies were studied and it was learned that, if Vapor Cough Rub is placed under their noses, they are really no more a threat than the bored youth that hang out at the mall or a stray pitbull. Sure there is the possibility that they would run amok, but for the most part they kept to themselves. The human population utilized the Zombies to do menial chores such as sign holder or drug mule.

 

Things seemed to have worked themselves out. People were happy dumping their chores on Zombies. The State granted them special ‘green cards’ to live and work as citizens and life seemed to continue along merrily, until the unspeakable happened –

The first Zombie / Human marriage.

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There was a fervent outcry and a self-appointed Moral Squad made up of the religious right, and Mothers Against Undead Dating (MAUD) protested against Los Angeles’s newly found sons and daughters, ready to destroy them at all costs. They are quickly counteracted against by the (Un)Human rights lobby, People for the Ethical treatment of Zombies (PEZ). Sure Zombies were fine to have work in your garden or walk your dog, but as soon as your daughter marries one, all hell breaks loose.

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The President, under the pressure of a low approval rating, has implemented a new initiative to clean up LA the best way he knows how: An elite task force run by individuals dedicated to the capturing and destroying of said Zombies. This task force shall be known as SPAZ - the Special Patrol Against Zombies.

 

There are only a few minor snags. There is no interest from any of the USA elite corps of soldiers, police or special government agencies. They are busy doing what they do best: arresting criminals, fighting wars and preventing domestic terrorist attacks within a twenty-four hour time period.

 

Somewhere they have to find candidates to fill the position and act and look the part. The conclusion was clear, promoting individuals from security guard positions and placing adverts in local grocers around the country. But it’s all right, the life of a SPAZ officer is not as glamorous as one would think, they are the equivalent of glorified dog catchers, but instead of pit bulls who have gone amok, it’s the smelly undead.

Most cases of Zombie disturbance have been chalked up to the misdemeanour category: Zombies staring into windows, disrupting church socials, getting in the way of traffic, swarming schoolyards at recess, that sort of thing.

 

On the other hand, people have grown so accustomed to them, they think Zombies are less trouble than they really are and there is always some Darwin Award candidate willing to risk his or her life for some street cred or a bitchin’ clip for Tik Tok.